Wigglebottom Farm

Bonaparte Dog

“Hello everyone. My name is Bonaparte. I can’t really think of anything interesting to say. I suppose I could tell you that I like bones. I’ve got lots of them, buried all over Wigglebottom Farm. I’ve got big ones, small ones, and some really tasty ones. I live in the farmhouse with Farmer John and the Farmer’s Wife. Some people call me a sausage dog and I don’t like being called that. I am a Daschund, not a sausage. A sausage is long and thin and brown and I’m……..long and thin and brown……. but I AM NOT A SAUSAGE.

I am the oldest of all the friends on the farm although Bernard may tell you he is. The truth is dog years are a lot longer than owl years so that makes me older than him. I don’t really have a best friend but if I had to choose one it would be Harper. He makes me laugh…..sometimes.

I came to the farm when I was a puppy and I have been here ever since. If I had a dream, which I don’t, it would be to dig up a huge juicy dinosaur bone. Bernard says that they are the biggest and that they are buried in the ground everywhere. I did try and find one once, on the lawn of the garden. The Farmer’s Wife was not very happy with me for making a hole in the lawn so I haven’t tried to find one again since that day.

My best hobby is bone counting. I’ve got lots of bones, did I already tell you that? My favourite food is…..bones.

I am not very good at making up rhymes. I don’t really see the point but I did one anyway. Would you like to hear it? I think it is quite good, even if I do say so myself.”